michelleponders

Yesterday was Mother’s Day here in the USA. A day to honor all moms and mother figures in children’s lives. I am a mom of 3 kids, 2 boys and 1 girl. My kids are grown now. My job of raising humans to be decent, God-fearing people is done. I watch parents in all stages of raising children from newborn to teenager and I know what they are going through for the most part. Children are individuals and must be raised as such. My kids were all different and had different needs that had to be handled according to the child.

My oldest is autistic. His age group were the pioneers in the study of autism and how to help these kids to be the best they can be. ARD meetings every school year with all the necessary adjustments needed to make sure he learned and succeeded. Life was crazy from the time he was little til about middle school. Then his ADHD finally began to subside. My middle child has comprehension struggles and she needed help in comprehending was she was learning and reading which led to her being diagnosed with secondary ADD. She had yearly ARDs as well which gave her necessary adjustments needed to succeed. High school proved to be too much for her and she graduated after attending a credit recovery program. My youngest struggled a lot and despite all the fighting I did on his behalf, I never could get him under an ARD so he could get the help he needed to succeed in school. The best I was able to get for him was under the 502 program and it did not meet his needs. He had/still has bad eye sight as well as a lazy eye. He had/still has dyslexia. He wasn’t diagnosed with dyslexia til 5th grade and he never learned the skills needed to succeed in education. He ended up dropping out of school once he hit 18 and there was nothing I could do. He was encouraged to go through the credit recovery program but never would do it.

I struggle with a lot of guilt to this day over raising my kids. I’ve asked God for forgiveness when I didn’t lead my kids as I should have. I have asked God for the strength to forgive myself and give myself grace and mercy in raising my kids. I was not a perfect mom by any stretch of the imagination. I had struggles with depression. I endured mental and emotional abuse from their father when we were married. I allowed people to influence how I raised my kids. But I did make sure my kids were in church at a very young age and made sure they had roots in faith. I raised my kids to respect their elders and to have manners. I taught them right from wrong and when push came to shove, my kids knew I was the parent they could count on.

My prayer now is that I will leave a legacy of knowing that God is a living God. That we are to worship Him in adoration and love. When it seems like He has forsaken us, He is walking side by side. Nothing is guaranteed in this life except the love of God. Man will always let us down but the love of God will always prevail.